Do you know that pre marriage counselling is an integral part of a happy married life with the changing times?
Most people need it but let me see you need Pre-marital counselling or not:****
What is Pre-Marriage Counselling
Whether you are having a love marriage or arranged marriage, it does not depict if you are getting married to your beloved, you tend to know everything about the person. It should be taken into consideration whether you choose your partner or your parents are choosing a partner for you; you need to look upon the major area that is the compatibility of you guys to solve the issue.
You need to ensure that you both can solve all the marriage issues. For this, you need to take a couple of counselling services from a marriage counsellor who can help you find out what precisely the marriage entails.
Now you must be thinking what exactly a pre-marital Counselling is all about and how it can help you? We have accumulated the answers to these questions just for you.
A pre-marriage counselling session is something that can help you find out the suitability of your life partner. A relationship calculator is placed on the page, which is an important tool to help you in understanding whether it's necessary to take the counselling or not.
Some sessions with the marriage counsellor can help you understand your partner better. You can also have confessions in front of the counsellor, which you have never decided or thought of discussing with your partner. A marriage counsellor can give you guidance and counselling to have a successful marriage; otherwise, this relationship can be taken for granted.
As per the research done, the statistics say that 30 percent of the couples find it good to have pre-marital counselling and have experienced a higher level of satisfaction after getting hitched up. On the contrary, 30 percent have declined the idea of getting a Relationship Counsellor's help and have faced divorce after few years of their marriage.
You will generate a solid foundation for your new life once you have understood each other better through the astrological interpretation of both charts. Pre-marital counselling facilitates the common ground for both of you. Things may be going well right now but maybe not too fortunate in the later part. A pre-marriage counselling with astrologer may help you in finding out the upcoming hurdles in the charts.
As we all know, the precaution is always better than cure, so it's better to resolve everything before with guidance and counselling, which can lead to a successful marriage.
How does Pre-Marriage Counselling work – in astrology
Now we should understand how pre-marriage counselling works does & how does astrology help in pre-marriage counselling. Below we have some mentioned points which one should discuss while having pre-marital counseling.
While starting or getting into any relationship, it is likely to be seen that we have a blueprint of the relationship we are into. When getting married and knowing something about you to be husband or wife, you will also have some blueprint in mind. Sometimes you may realize that you will also have some ideas or beliefs of their own.
Men tend not to be or less vocal about their idea of marriage, but that doesn't mean that they don't have any expectations. Discussing anything before your wedding will help both come to a successful marriage when it is about respecting the expectations.
A relationship counsellors see the Lagna or the ascendants of both the partners and will study it in deep along with its Navamsha to get the results that matter.
Possibilities of what your husband to be are expecting you in terms of your home and professional lives?
a. What would you expect him to do?
b. Does he want you to cook for him regularly?
c. Are you expecting him to help you with household chores?
d. Are you looking for hiring a helping hand for household chores or expect him/her to help you?
e. Are you open to in-laws? Will you like to live with them? It would be suitable if you were very clear about where you stand in such points.
While you both need to compromise and come to a mutual ground of understanding or some points, you must be very particular about it. This can help you in clarifying things in your mind, and you can take a good discussion about the same. The astrological charts' interpretation with guidance and counselling can clearly understand what you will be like in the future. A relationship counsellor will give you an easy way to discuss and solve it.
Past, present, future:
We are the results of our encounters, circumstances, and situations. How you see the marriage and couples you knew developing up, what you saw happening in those marriages, might have indeed subconsciously influenced your discernment of marriage. This applies to him/her as well. So, you might have built up an off-base thought of how all weddings would be based on your earlier recognitions.
A pre-marital counsellor will get you to rethink deeply about your convictions and suppositions and how they are in real. This will assist in understanding the issues, if any, and how you find a solution. Having the right ideas of marriage will help the two of you within the success of your wedding.
When planning about your financial condition or your home's budget, you look at the source of income for both the members. Are you both planning to contribute to the house budget, or are you both planning to separate the expenses and take care of it, respectively?
You need to understand what the other person expects and find out the best way to move forward. Another area that we should discuss is about your lifestyle and savings. Or either you are planning to continue investing separately after getting married too. You both need to speak together on such questions as you need to ensure the ways that are not stressful for you and find out the ideas that suit you guys well.
A pre-marital counselor will let you have an in-depth conversation about your opinions and thoughts related to monetary terms. A marriage therapist will help you find out the ways of getting upon the mutual ground.
Sex and Intimacy
Speaking openly about sex education in India is a taboo, and generally, we consider it not to discuss in an intellectual environment. So there is all possibility that you may not have spoken about it properly with one another. This is an important aspect where couples need to talk. There can be some changes where you have been in discussion about the same, and may you have considered reading some books or magazines, but you should not apply it all in your real lives.
A relationship counselor will help you both discuss your needs and desires and have a happy sexual life after your marriage. An Astro Relationship Counsellor can do an in-depth study of 4th, 7th, and 12th houses.
Plans for Children
When starting a conversation about marriage, the significant aspect which comes up in mind is children. The questions which usually arise are how many and in what time frame with the parenting styles. You want to seek the help of extended family involvement; these are such topics that one should discuss.
For many marriage issues faced by couples, children can be a deal-breaker.
A relationship counsellor can read your birth chart and give you counselling services accordingly. This can be beneficial for your post-marriage life.
Communication and conflict resolution
As we all know, communication is an essential part of any relationship. Most importantly, in married life, which has initially started, it becomes more crucial. In marriage, you need to understand the way of communication, and you must find out a common approach where you two could have direct and open contact—getting scared of each other's reaction and about the outcome without speaking. Ignoring the result of how it can turn out to be a huge marriage issue can be a greater problem.
Being into healthy communication and expressing feelings towards each other is essential. It would be best if you search the way of communication during or after being into a conflict.
Both minds don't have to be on the same page, sometimes arguments and disagreements can happen and act in a way which is offensive for you and your partner can affect your marriage. So, it's important to predict the marriage issues which can be sorted out by taking some relationship counselling sessions.
These are most common things that can be looked after by a couple of counselling services. You don't have only to discuss the points mentioned earlier. Once you are taking a pre-marital counselling service, you will find out several other aspects of your marriage and how you want to handle the same.
Get many important information about your birth chart using our free calculators by date of birth.
Benefits of Pre-Marital Astro Counselling
One wonders as to what are the benefits of pre-marriage counselling. Can it resolve the relationship issues? Yes, pre-marriage counselling helps you to improve your relationship. What benefits one derives from a pre-marriage counselling are explained below:
Pre-marriage counselling will facilitate the necessary guidance and advice that is important for you to discuss and reach a proper solution for you and your partner. You may tend to get emotional and carried away once you start talking about the topics for which you have strong feelings.
Learning conflict resolving skills
Everything will not go like a piece of cake every time. If you can solve one conflict, its good, you have got some skills. But when we talk about the further conflicts faced by people in marriage, you need to seek a Pre-marital Counselling, which can help you find out easier ways of resolving them and finding the best results.
Setting realistic expectations
It is not about expectations from the other, which might be possible and a time frame which they want. Setting up realistic goals for your expectations is something that you will get to learn in pre-marital counselling.
Identifying areas of conflicts in the future
You may not have any problem with each other at present, but everything might not go in the same way soon also. Things can become worst if they are not identified on time. This can only be determined once you take counselling services by a relationship counsellor.
Understanding your Past for a better future
A pre-marital counsellor can help you in digesting your past or the marriage issues you may have seen in other marriages. A possibility of getting raised in a dysfunctional family can also be a huge problem for you and your partner. It would be suited if you learned how to break the cycle, and a relationship counsellor can be helpful for the same.
A relationship counsellor will give a better idea of are different topics you guys need to discuss. Some of basic questions are listed below, which can be considered with each other before you ensure happiness after the marriage.
What does a Pre Marriage Counsellor do – Astrologically
A marriage counsellor analyses your charts and horoscope to identify and resolve all the questions before these can convert into crisis.
a. Are you both comfortable with the salary difference between you both?
b. Do you both decided to support the family financially, or will the situation be different once the kids are there?
c. How have you planned to be together with family?
d. Where will you stay after the arrival of children?
e. How do you both determining a new career or job is reason enough to transfer?
f. Do you plan to live in the present address for a longer period?
g. Do you need to stay closer to your parents or when they are old?
h. When would you plan on start a family and the number of children you planned?
Would Abortion is acceptable before or after that?
a. What philosophies did your parents have concerning about child-raising, or would you agree or disagree with it? How will you intend to shape your children's values?
b. Will you both have separate or joint accounts?
c. If you do have different accounts, who is responsible for which expenses? Who will pay the bills?
d. Do the two of you always agree to have full financial disclosure about the personal financial situation?
e. How will disagreements about spending money matters?
f. Is there any kind of loans that either of you haveacquired before wedding (For example, college school loans or credit card debt)?
g. How much available money you both need to spend your life comfortably?
h. Will there be any saving plans for first residence?
i. Do you plan to keep buying and selling houses until you afford you dream house?
j. How much loanis acceptable to either of you?
k. Do you both agree about the way of taking care of the financial needs of parents?
What will be the Education plans for your Children?
a. When do you hope to start retirement savings?
b. How much time both of you want to spend with your parents, and how you want your partner to company?
c. Your plans to spend your vacation?
d. What will be your expectations and your parents concerning holidays, and how efficiently you will deal?
e. What support do you expect from a partner when parents are pressurizing you?
f. Is it okay for either one of you to talk with your parents about your married life issues?
g. What treatment do you accept from your parents concerning your child?
h. Do you anticipate that your parent lives with the two of you when you grow old?
i. What were the family roles, or who did what in the family when you grew up?
j. Did you find them fair or you expect something else?
k. Do both of you have some preferences?
l. How will you deal with household maintenance? How will you divide up responsibilities, or will you need a helping something?
m. Will both of you continue to work after having kids?
n. When any children get sick, how would you decide to stay and take care?
o. Do you both agree with the problem concerning intimate occasions?
p. How do you want to enjoy intimate evenings?
q. Do you have any different sexual preferences, and how do you resolve issues regarding it?
r. Can you agree on how to deal with differences in the frequency of sexual desire?
s. Are there certain things that are off-limits?
t. Would you both talk about your sexual issues at time when two of you are feeling creative and relaxed and not during sex?
u. How will you resolve heated conflicts?
v. Based on experience in a family of origin, what can you learn about how your partner dealing with issues?
w. Can either of you take some timeout to calm down or creatively solve the problem?
x. What rules which will develop to talk about after big argument?
What does spirituality meant for both of you?
a. What participation do you expect from each other in any spiritual or religious community?
How will you share important matters?
a. Will your children attend any regular services or religious education?
b. Does your child need to go through any ritual?
By stating all the problems, I have tried to address the issues as a relationship counsellor. It's a benefited approach for many clients, who were ready to know about marriage issues through pre-marital counselling.
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